Habit Cultivation

New Habits, and Several Updates!

/ Bethany / Leave a comment

It’s been a few weeks since I’ve posted. (I’ve been more active on my Facebook page, so if you missed me, you can follow me there as well.)

New Habits (Movement and Productivity)

I’ve added some new habits to my routine that I haven’t actually added to my spreadsheet:

  • When I drive somewhere, parking at the far end of the parking lot, as long as the weather is good. This helps me get more movement into my day without having to think about it.
  • On work days, eating my lunch somewhere other than at my desk, whether it is outside, in my car, or even at the conference table – what matters is that I am walking away from my laptop screen. I have been having trouble focusing at work, and that is getting much better with my sleep apnea being treated. However, I also find that if I don’t take an actual break, I have more trouble focusing later in the day. So, I am consciously taking a break at lunch time, so my mind doesn’t force me to take breaks later in the day.
  • I have begun leaving my lunchbox in my car on workdays, instead of bringing it to my desk in the morning. That helps with a few things: 1. It forces me to get up and walk to the car when it is time for lunch, which helps me remember to take the aforementioned break. 2. It prevents mindless eating in the afternoon. When I didn’t take my break away from my desk, my mind would wander, and sometimes I would grab a snack to procrastinate. Now, if I want my food, I actually have to get up and go get it. and 3. It puts a little more movement into my day, even if I don’t have time for formal “exercise” on a workday.
  • Putting my phone away in a drawer while I’m at work. I didn’t realize how easy it was to check the phone to procrastinate when I needed a break. I don’t feel comfortable leaving the phone in the car, in case my son’s babysitter or my coworkers need to reach me. But I turn the volume up so I can hear it if it rings, and tuck it away so I have to consciously take it out if I need it (instead of mindlessly picking it up off my desk).

I didn’t add those habits to my spreadsheet as something to track; I just changed my routine up. Since it feels pretty painless, I don’t feel the need to track them at this time.

Sleep Apnea Treatment Update

Everything has been going really well. The CPAP machine has added at least a decade back onto my life. It has reduced my breathing events by over 99 percent. Some things I have noticed: I am able to focus more clearly at work. I feel more ready to engage with people. I sometimes sleep all the way through the night now. My husband says I no longer snore. Plus all the stuff I listed before.

I am also noticing a huge difference in what I can do at home now. I am doing things that my husband always had to do in the past. I cleaned out our car (voluntarily), and cleaned up after the weekly cooking (voluntarily).  I won’t say I am able to clean up every day, but even being able to do it some days is a huge improvement for me. I feel very pleased that I am able to do more to contribute to our household now.

I finally had my first appointment with a sleep specialist and I am happy to report that I had a positive experience, as a fat person. The only time she mentioned my weight was to ask “how has your weight been,” while she was asking the typical medical history and symptom questions. She did not lecture me. She seemed pleased about my habits. When I asked her if sleep apnea could cause weight gain, she said yes, and explained about leptin, and said that untreated sleep apnea could make weight loss difficult.

And then she looked in my mouth and told me that the size of my tongue was almost certainly the reason for my sleep apnea. So, that was positive! And it means that my suspicion that I have had this for many years and at many different weights is likely correct.

Movement Update

Lifting has been going well. The simplified program I started in January is still working well for me. It fits well into my life and I am making progress, feeling good, and recovering well.

Meal Prep Update

We are still in what feels like a pretty sustainable groove with meal preparation. I did spend more money eating out than I would have liked, last month. But I also had days where I felt tempted to eat take out, and I packed a meal or cooked a meal at home instead. So there is definitely improvement. Patience is my friend.

That’s all I have to report today! More posts in the queue soon….

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February Habit Update (Late, I know!)

/ Bethany / Leave a comment

I forgot to post a February habit update. Here’s a quick report on how I am doing with my current habits.  I am sick today so I don’t have the patience to list exact numbers or percentages like I did in January.

Number of days tracking habit goals: 433!

I am either on track or ahead of schedule with the following habits:

  • eat a vegetable with at least two meals. Goal: 150 times by the end of 2016 (goal set on Feb. 7th).
  • Strength workout. Goal: 160 times in 2016.
  • No TV shows started after 9pm. Goal: 250 times in 2016.
  • Date with my husband. Goal: 10 times in 2016.
  • Do some intentional cleaning. Goal: 50 times by the end of 2016. (goal set on Jan. 1)
  • Name something I love or appreciate about myself. Goal: 350 times by the end of 2016. (goal set on Jan. 1)
  • Name something for which I feel grateful. Goal: 350 days in 2016.

That’s seven habits! Pretty darn awesome.

I am slightly behind schedule on these habits, but still making consistent steady progress:

  • Do something myself instead of asking my husband to do it for me. Goal: 150 times by the end of 2016 (goal set on Feb. 7th)
  • Take an intentional walk. Goal: 200 times in 2016.
  • Take Vitamin D. Goal: 355 times in 2015.
  • Eat a green vegetable. Goal: 355 days in 2016.
  • Take Vitamin D. Goal: 355 times in 2015.
  • Finish my food for the day by 8pm. Goal: 225 times in 2016.
  • In bed by 10pm. Goal:250 times in 2016.
  • Say or do something nice for my husband. Goal: 250 times in 2016.
  • Get rid of 500 items from our home in 2016.

That’s 9 habits that are slightly behind schedule, but still making steady progress. It is only the beginning of March, too. That’s the beauty of setting yearly goals –  I know, for example, the walking habit will likely be back on schedule once the weather gets nicer. And I know that some of the habits fell a little behind while I was getting used to falling asleep with the CPAP machine. If I am still behind in a month or two, I will consider resetting the goal numbers to something more realistic for me.

There is one habit that I have not been making good progress on:

  • Deposit at least $10 into my family’s emergency fund: 50 times in 2016.

And that is because I have not set up an easy way to do it, and now that I have to drive my husband everywhere it is more difficult for me to make time to get to the bank. Now, we do have some money direct deposited from my husband’s paycheck, but I would like to be able to do more and hope to get back to this one soon.

There is one habit that my husband has taken over for me:

  • Make a pot of rice and beans: 45 times in 2016.

And I am not arguing, because he is the one who eats it anyway! I don’t like them that much.

And I added two new habits to the list in February, because I realized I was already doing them and wanted to check off more easy columns on my chart:

  • Eat a source of protein with at least 2 meals. Goal: 265 times by the end of 2016. Goal set on Feb. 25th. Making steady progress. Like I said, I added it to my list because I realized I was already doing it, with ease.
  • eat a vegetable with at least two meals. Goal: 150 times by the end of 2016 (goal set on Feb. 7th). Already killing this habit (it’s on the first list too).

That’s it for February and early March!

Wondering how I figured out these habit goals? I wrote a series of posts about my process. You can start here.

Wondering how I track my goals? That’s covered in the third post of the series, and also in this post.

Wondering how I did in 2015, and what effects I’ve noticed? Here’s the report.

Wondering how I did in January 2016? Here’s the report.

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What HAES Actually Says About Weight Loss (as a Result of Healthy Behaviors)

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Content Heads-up:  This post includes direct quotes about bodyweight and setpoint from Linda Bacon’s book, Health at Every Size. It also discusses how I am viewing some unintentional but not unwelcome weight loss.

Underpants Rule Statement: This post discusses my own thoughts on how to handle weight change talk in my own space, based on the original HAES work. It is not an attempt to tell other people how to handle weight change talk in their spaces.

As I mentioned in a previous post, I have been losing weight as a result of my Intuitive Eating practice. Once I began noticing my satiety signals, and feeling safe enough to trust myself not to restrict food based on them, I started noticing some weight loss. (By the way, Intuitive Eating is not a weight loss method. Weight loss is only one possible outcome out of three.)  Should I or shouldn’t I talk about it on this blog?

When I published that post, most people were supportive, yet a few made a point of letting me know that they thought I was “doing it [HAES] wrong.” Since many online groups that discuss HAES ban weight change talk completely, should I also do so for this blog?

More and more, I am thinking the answer to that is “No.” If weight isn’t a moral issue, why not write about it like I would any other change that is happening?

Here’s the thing: Not even Linda Bacon, the creator of the “Health at Every Size” approach, refrains from talking about weight changes. While she recommends forgetting about weight change as a goal or a as path to health in and of itself, she does not give it Lord Voldemort status of “that which must not be named.” She actually writes extensively about weight regulation and weight change as a result of a HAES approach.

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Still Getting Better!

/ Bethany / 2 Comments

I had a great week. Everything keeps getting better. Last week I wrote some posts about how CPAP therapy is going for me. You can read them here, and here.

My kid had an ear infection this week, so he woke us up a lot at night for a few days, and I felt tired. But the amazing thing is, my mood was still good.  Even after 4 nights of interrupted sleep. In the months before I got my CPAP, if my kid had a bad night, my mood was terrible the next day. I found dealing with people to be too overwhelming. I felt irritable. I don’t drink coffee regularly, but I would go get coffee on those days. It didn’t help much. So, it was a big deal that this week we had four nights of interrupted sleep, and my mood was good even though I was tired.

In fact, I even did some housework after that fourth day! My kid was taking a nap, and a friend called. While I was chatting with her, I noticed that I had energy and didn’t want to sit still. So I got down on the floor and began stretching. Then I was done, and looking for something else to do. So I started cleaning off my bathroom countertop. Then the floor around the toilet. Then the baseboard. Then the sink. Then a couple spots on the walls, and the mirror. Then  dusted the bookshelf in my room, and in kiddo’s room. Then I took the trash cans out to the curb. Then I changed the cat litter. And all this was on a day I had already lifted in the morning, and after 4 days of sick-kiddo-interrupted sleep.

This was more housework than I would get done in a month or two, before. Before, I never had any motivation to do housework. The thought of it always seemed overwhelming.  I felt self conscious, thinking that everyone thought I was lazy, but I still couldn’t get myself to do it.  And I never would have done it on the same day I lifted weights. I always needed a lot of rest and recovery time afterwards. Essentially, I had to choose between lifting and housework. I always chose lifting, because it was more fun and it gave me lots of benefits, such as normalizing my blood sugar and just feeling better. It is amazing to me that now I can do BOTH sometimes.

My complexion is also improving. The photo on the left was taken a couple weeks before I started CPAP. The photo on the right was taken 12 days after I started CPAP. Look how my skin and eyes have brightened up!
image

I still haven’t been able to take a nap with the machine on. I tried for the second time this week and couldn’t fall asleep. However, laying in a dark room breathing deeply for 30 minutes was refreshing enough in and of itself.

On the training front, I finished my second Wendler 5 3 1 cycle of the year. The new minimalist lifting schedule is working out great. I still feel strong, and I still have enough energy to handle my other shit. So I will be keeping that up.  Unfortunately I caught my kid’s bug, so I will be waiting a few days to start the third cycle.

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Convenience and Saving Money Through Meal Planning – What’s Working For Me

/ Bethany / 2 Comments

Happy March! This month, the Healthy Habits Happy Moms habit of the month is meal planning / meal prep (go check them out if you are looking for healthy habit ideas! I’ve tried a few of them and have really enjoyed them).  I have been doing some form of meal planning for several years now, and have tried several different strategies.  This post will discuss some of the strategies I have tried, and what is working for me right now.
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A Weighty Experiment

/ Bethany / 5 Comments

I sometimes struggle with whether, when, and how I should mention bodyweight changes on this blog.

I have been very grateful for online support in my healthy habits practice. Some of my favorite groups have a lot in common. They recommend focusing on:

  • the process of creating healthy habits, as opposed to the outcome
  •  loving your body as it is, now
  • finding a form of movement you enjoy doing consistently
  • learning to pay attention to your hunger and satiety signals, and recognizing factors that might prevent you from doing this
  • getting enough rest
  • taking care of mental and emotional health
  • getting treatment for any medical conditions you may have
  • setting healthy boundaries
  • cultivating patience and long term, sustainable habits that fit into your life

But when it comes to the question of “should we discuss bodyweight / weight loss?” ,  there is definitely a difference of opinion. Of course there are shades of gray in everything, but I’ve noticed that the support groups I love tend to fall into one of two camps: the “HAES/no weight loss talk allowed” camp, and the “discussion about habits that encourage weight loss is allowed and encouraged” camp.

Since I learn from and benefit from groups in both of these camps, I sometimes struggle with “what direction do I take for this blog?”

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125 Things to Do Instead of Trolling People on the Internet

/ Bethany / 3 Comments

I write a lot about forming life enriching habits. One of the things I talk about in this post on is that instead of focusing on things you want to STOP doing, most people find more success with forming habits they would like to cultivate instead. (In other words, work on a “DO” habit instead of a “DON’T” habit.)

So, instead of saying to myself “I want to stop yelling at my kids,” I might have more success if I learn some discipline tools that you can use instead of yelling at my kids.

Instead of “stop spending money on take-out,” I might have more success if I work on positive habits, such as paying all the bills and putting money into savings as soon as I get paid.

And if I find myself trolling people on the internet, instead of telling myself “stop trolling people on the internet,” I might be more successful if I choose something else to do instead.

In that spirit, I offer the following list of things one might do instead of trolling people on the internet.

  1. Study for that test
  2. Do your homework
  3. Work on your college applications
  4. Study for the S.A.T.
  5. Cook dinner for your parents
  6. Clean up the kitchen
  7. Pay a bill
  8. Take out the trash
  9. Take a shower
  10. Say something kind to someone
  11. Go for a walk
  12. Go to the gym
  13. Do your laundry
  14. Go to bed
  15. Donate money to a charitable cause
  16. KonMari your home
  17. Take a professional development course
  18. Go grocery shopping
  19. Play a video game
  20. Knit a sweater or something
  21. Skateboard
  22. Go for a run
  23. Go for a swim
  24. Go for a hike
  25. Pick up litter on the street
  26. Reach out to your therapist
  27. Learn a new language
  28. Read a book
  29. Redecorate your home
  30. Plant some flowers
  31. Plant a vegetable garden
  32. Write about yourself instead of other people
  33. Play an instrument
  34. Sing some karaoke
  35. Sing in a chorus
  36. Work on your resume
  37. Send out a job application
  38. Go do some online shopping
  39. Figure out your budget
  40. Figure out your long term financial plan.
  41. Volunteer
  42. Plan a date for your significant other
  43. Have sex with a consenting adult. Or two. Whatever.
  44. Masturbate
  45. Work on an arts and crafts project
  46. Paint a picture
  47. Draw
  48. Finally get your small business plan written
  49. Ask someone how their day was
  50. Run an errand you have been putting off
  51. Buy someone a gift for someone in your life
  52. Make a gift for someone in your life
  53. Watch TV
  54. Watch a movie at home
  55. Binge watch your favorite show on Netflix
  56. Go to the library
  57. Watch a documentary
  58. Go sky diving
  59. Book a ticket to someplace you have always wanted to visit
  60. Call a relative
  61. Clean out your pantry and bring food to a food bank
  62. Meditate
  63. Do some yoga
  64. Learn a martial art
  65. Learn Parkour
  66. Pray
  67. Go to sleep
  68. Play fantasy football
  69. Play real football
  70. Play Magic the Gathering
  71. Play Dungeons and Dragons
  72. Play World of War craft
  73. Play GURPS
  74. Watch porn
  75. Smoke whatever you enjoy
  76. Drink
  77. Use your substance of choice
  78. Listen to a loved one
  79. Talk about your own problems
  80. Go out for dinner
  81. Buy a new outfit
  82. Learn a new sport
  83. Shoot baskets
  84. Listen to an audiobook
  85. Go to a concert
  86. Go to a movie
  87. Go to a play
  88. Go to a museum
  89. Bake your favorite dessert
  90. Cook your favorite meal
  91. Read a science textbook
  92. Read a history textbook
  93. Watch paint dry
  94. Learn how to read and interpret statistics and scientific studies
  95. Walk your dog
  96. Clean your cat’s litter box
  97. Post pictures of yourself on social media
  98. Pick a new habit to work on
  99. Do a jigsaw puzzle
  100. Play Sudoku
  101. Do a crossword puzzle
  102. Paint your nails
  103. Plant an herb garden
  104. Organize your bookshelf
  105. Delete all the files you don’t need off your computer
  106. Delete all the files you don’t need off your phone
  107. Cry if you need to. Really.
  108. Build a piece of furniture
  109. Scrub your floors
  110. Brush your teeth
  111. Drink a glass of water
  112. Clean your bathroom
  113. Do some origami
  114. Listen to a podcast
  115. Listen to a symphony
  116. Get treatment for your depression
  117. Get treatment for your anxiety
  118. Listen to an opera
  119. Listen to the radio
  120. Groom your pet
  121. Watch stand-up comedy videos
  122. Watch how-to videos
  123. Dance
  124. Learn an new skill
  125. Read things on the internet that you actually like, and comment positively on them.

If you are looking for more guidance on how to set a sustainable habit goal, start with this post.

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A Great Day!

/ Bethany / Leave a comment

I had a fantastic day today!

I started off in a really grumpy mood. I hadn’t been to barbell club in a while and I wanted to go alone. But my husband had physical therapy and I was grumpy about bringing my kiddo.

It turned out great though. Kiddo ran off his energy by running laps around the training rig and playing with various balls and jump ropes he found, as well as the dogs that were visiting today, and his lunch, and his toy barbell.

Once I started lifting I felt better. My lifts felt great today and it turned my mood around! I did snatches, clean and jerks, and bench presses. Even though I am only doing olympic lifts once per week now, I felt good about how they went. And my bench press form is improving. Like a real powerlifter with my back arched and my ass off the bench! I also got some tips on setting up a sumo deadlift, which I will try tomorrow when I do my deadlifts.

Afterwards I got to go out by myself. I got a new phone for my birthday and I went to get it activated. I can’t tell whether I am more excited about the new phone or the CPAP machine I am getting on Tuesday.

And then got myself some treats. Something from a local candy shop called a fudge caramallow I think? And some Vietnamese food. I ate them for dinner. Om nom nom. Oh, and a jasmine limeade while I waited for takeout and played with my new phone. (Oh, THAT would be why I still have so much energy this late at night. The green tea in the limeade…)

I am excited to go watch a weightlifting competition tomorrow! It will be my first competition I am watching in person (as opposed to online).

I Color-Coded My Habit Tracker, and Couldn’t Believe What Happened Next

/ Bethany / 1 Comment

When I color coded my habit tracking spreadsheet, I thought it was just going to be a fun way to categorize my habits and make my spreadsheet nice to look at. I didn’t realize that it would also encourage and reinforce moderation, balance and slow, sustainable changes. I didn’t know that it would discourage obsessing over one particular area of lifestyle at the expense of other areas. And yet, that’s exactly what it is doing.

Habit Sheet

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Weekend update – New Wendler Cycle, New Habits, and other Miscellany

/ Bethany / 1 Comment

Nothing exciting today. Just a weekend update. Boring ass real life on the habit train….

Last week I finished my first cycle of Wendler 5/3/1 and this weekend I started my second cycle. So far it’s going well. I like the flexibility. I can spend less than 20 minutes per day if I want….or if I prefer I can combine days. I like how I feel so far.  Some days I’ve lifted first thing in the morning. Other days, after my kid goes to bed.

For this cycle, I am going to try including Olympic lifts 1 day per week, and see how that feels for me. I did them last night while watching Grease Live with my husband. The clean and jerk still felt pretty easy. The snatch felt a little awkward after a four week break.

I’ve been having some issues with my medical insurance not wanting to cover the recommended follow up testing for my diagnosis. Looks like I will probably be getting a machine soon, however. Fingers crossed! Now that I know I’m not breathing well at night, I want to fix it as soon as possible.

I went in for some routine bloodwork and weighed myself on the scale at the lab. The scale confirmed what I already knew by the way my clothes fit – I had lost a few pounds since I last weighed myself 3 months ago.  I didn’t do anything to intentionally lose the pounds; I just continued with all my habits, with the addition of using my new intuitive eating skills.  I’m trying not to get excited or put too much pressure on myself. It’s more difficult than it sounds.

It’s been about 5 weeks since I added a new habit. I am adding two more habits to my list today:

  • eat a vegetable with at least two meals (goal: 150 days by the end of the year).
  • do something myself instead of asking my husband to do it (goal: 150 days by the end of the year).

I’ve already been doing these items more than usual, so I’m pretty sure I can succeed with these goals.