When I color coded my habit tracking spreadsheet, I thought it was just going to be a fun way to categorize my habits and make my spreadsheet nice to look at. I didn’t realize that it would also encourage and reinforce moderation, balance and slow, sustainable changes. I didn’t know that it would discourage obsessing over one particular area of lifestyle at the expense of other areas. And yet, that’s exactly what it is doing.
Nothing exciting today. Just a weekend update. Boring ass real life on the habit train….
Last week I finished my first cycle of Wendler 5/3/1 and this weekend I started my second cycle. So far it’s going well. I like the flexibility. I can spend less than 20 minutes per day if I want….or if I prefer I can combine days. I like how I feel so far. Some days I’ve lifted first thing in the morning. Other days, after my kid goes to bed.
For this cycle, I am going to try including Olympic lifts 1 day per week, and see how that feels for me. I did them last night while watching Grease Live with my husband. The clean and jerk still felt pretty easy. The snatch felt a little awkward after a four week break.
I’ve been having some issues with my medical insurance not wanting to cover the recommended follow up testing for my diagnosis. Looks like I will probably be getting a machine soon, however. Fingers crossed! Now that I know I’m not breathing well at night, I want to fix it as soon as possible.
I went in for some routine bloodwork and weighed myself on the scale at the lab. The scale confirmed what I already knew by the way my clothes fit – I had lost a few pounds since I last weighed myself 3 months ago. I didn’t do anything to intentionally lose the pounds; I just continued with all my habits, with the addition of using my new intuitive eating skills. I’m trying not to get excited or put too much pressure on myself. It’s more difficult than it sounds.
It’s been about 5 weeks since I added a new habit. I am adding two more habits to my list today:
I’ve already been doing these items more than usual, so I’m pretty sure I can succeed with these goals.
This week I was diagnosed with severe obstructive sleep apnea and sleep related hypoventilation.
I am feeling a lot of things around this diagnosis. A little fear (untreated, sleep apnea can lead to serious things like heart attacks and strokes), a little anger, but mostly relief and gratitude.
I love watching my kiddo at swim class. He is developing his skills and comfort level with floating on his back.
It’s interesting to observe that he has days where everything seems easy and fun for him and he makes a lot of progress (last Thursday), and days where he is having a hard time for whatever reason (today). Today he took an unexpected nap in the car on the way to the lesson, was overall droopy and tired after a busy day yesterday, and apprehensive about using the toilet. He still demonstrated the skills he’d solidified on Thursday, but didn’t work on them for as long. He was mentally ready to be done early today.
That was totally okay – I never thought to myself “oh, these setbacks means he will never learn to swim. What a waste of time and money.” Yet, we often think those things about ourselves when we have a day where we don’t practice our own new skills/habits to the extent we would like.
Just like I can observe him without judgment or apprehension, I can also learn to observe my own learning process in the same way. Skills will come in time, with consistent work, if they are meant to.
In the past couple months I’ve had a lot of changes going on in my relationship with food. I’ve been making a lot of progress with eating intuitively. I’ve been hesitant to blog about this, but I wanted to at least document these changes for my own processing. And I kiiiinda want to share it, because I feel like it might help somebody, but I feel REALLY nervous about it, too.
One of the things I have been asking myself lately is “why am I hesitant to share publicly about food relationship developments?” A few answers come to mind:
So, just to put all my cards on the table: In my food posts, I’m talking about my own personal relationship to food. I am not suggesting other people do what I do. I am not promoting dieting or intentional weight loss, regardless of what happens to my own body weight as a result of changes in my relationship with food. Even if my body weight changes as a result of changes in my relationship with food, I have no reason to believe that the new body weight will be permanent (as evidence shows that lasting weight loss is very uncommon). I do enjoy eating. I think the cultural expectation that all women eat like birds is fucked up (nothing against people who are naturally small and naturally have bird-like appetites. You people carry on and keep doing you).
Okay then! Let’s begin.
Today marks the one year point for when I set my first habit goals and set up a spreadsheet to track them . I’m calling it my habitiversary. I’m not sure I like the term; let me know if you think of something catchier ;).
I started with a just a couple, and now I have a color-coded rainbow spreadsheet to track many habits across many areas of my self-care. Not to mention a blog, and a series on how to help others get started making successful habit changes.
When I started last year, deciding to track healthy habits instead of a number on a scale or clothing size was unfamiliar territory for me. I decided I wanted to be open to whatever outcomes would come.
A couple weeks ago I wrote a post about a new habit I had started that was provoking some conflicted feelings. A month has gone by since I started this habit, and I’ve been having some thoughts and feelings I wanted to document before I forget about them. So, you get a post! Yay!
The habit goal I am writing about is “finish my food by 8pm, 25 times by the end of the year.” I was experiencing both optimism and apprehension about adopting this habit. My biggest fear was that a habit like this would send me back into a dieting/restriction oriented mindset.
Overall, this habit is going a lot better than I expected, both in terms of emotional response and implementation.
Power, Peace, and the Porch Gym 